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I first discovered my sister had a spilling problem when we went on a family vacation to Sanibel Island my sophmore year of high school. During this vacation, their were two specific incidents that have left me wondering about my sisters ability to ever act sophisticated at a dinner table. The first incident was at Dairy Queen, one of my all time favorite Ice Cream establishments. Those that know me know that I have the uncanny ability to consume more ice cream than any human should. So while eating my HUGE chocolate ice cream, my sister decides that the vanilla she petitioned for was no longer sufficient. She wanted chocolate ice cream. My dad, a man of practicality, decided that it would be silly to wait in line when I had a large amount of ice cream already in front of me. Nicely, I let her have the ice cream because my dad told me “She’ll get tired of it really quick, then you can have the vanilla and the chocolate.” As he was saying this, I remember seeing my sister reaching for the ice cream. The condensation on the side of the cup had obviously made it slippery. I blacked out. When I came too my ice cream was on the floor, face down….the sprinkles were everywhere! EVERYWHERE! Just lying there. “SPRINKLES!!!!!” I was far too pissed off to eat ice cream the rest of the night. The incident that really revealed my sister had a problem was in a pizza parlor. She had always eaten pizza, but following the examples of her big brothers she wanted a ‘sub’. Not just any sub, she wanted her own sub. She threw a little girl fit until she got one. So the boys get their food and start chowing down. My sister, obviously intimidated by this piece of italian culinary perfection sat for a while. When she decided she was ready to eat, she went to grab the sub, but managed to have her hand catch on the basket that it was contained in. On the ground it went: open faced. My Dad was so upset he excused himself from the table and had to step outside for a few moments. I’m not sure what happened while he was outside, but I think I could barely make out him throwing his hat on the ground and jumping all over it. So began the saga of: “Spiller.” |
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Funny Things My Sister Has Spilled |
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1) A huge ice cream cup. |
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2) A huge submarine sandwich |
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3) Water in a wine glass while falling off a chair at pass over dinner. |
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4) A 5 pound tub of Jelly Belly gourmet Jelly beans. (Like a rain stick it sounded) |
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5) A huge bag of beads. (Jelly bean flash backs) |
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6) A can of tomato sauce on her toe. |
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7) A whole 2 liter bottle of coke, which she tried her hardest to conceal. |