My Aunt Is Hot » Funny Texts

Mix CD’s

Josh — Sat, 26 Jun 2010 00:27:01 +0000

Bees Nest

Josh — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 23:15:34 +0000

Her: Hmph. So apparently we’re only friends when you’re drunk and feeling sorry for yourself. How considerate of you, Joshua.

Josh: Not true. We’re not even friends then.

Her: So you texted me the other night, why? If I’m not your friend and im definitely not your girlfriend. I’m just your pity party then?

Josh: You’re like the a bees nest. I know I shouldn’t be bothering you, but sometimes, I just want to see what will come of it.

Her: I don’t know how to reply to that…

Josh: It’s kind of a lovely notion. Don’t spoil it by making me hate it.

Drugs And Rock ‘n’ Roll

Josh — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 21:15:13 +0000

Her: …but Lindsay and I will head down early?!

Josh: Sounds like the makings of a great night.

Her: Ha Ha I don’t know about that… maybe you should leave your drugs and rock n roll at home tonight.

Josh: Bring Sex?

Her: What? Ha ha this is where I do the awkward robot…

But Sex.

Josh — Sun, 28 Jun 2009 17:38:01 +0000

Josh: …I’ve been kicked out of college. And stupid was not the problem.

Her: Drugs? Alcohol? But Sex?

Her: I meant butt sex. Excuse me.

Josh: Well, the first one of those lead to the third one which drove me to the second.

Lost and Found

Josh — Sun, 28 Jun 2009 17:32:12 +0000

Context: Some idiot girl left her cell phone outside my house. So I texted her friend and put the phone in the mail box.

Josh: Hey. Special delivery for you in the mailbox.

Her: Haha. What?!

Josh: Listen to me. Go outside, turn left and open the mailbox. More instructions will follow.

Her: Haha she was just looking for that! Thank you : )

Crying.

Josh — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 17:14:08 +0000

Josh: Are you better?

Her: If you remember great. I dont and steph doesn’t and my friend maurice only knows bits and pieces. Long islands and best friend drama in it’s finest fashion.

Josh: I don’t. I just saw you there crying and absolutely could not have cared less.