Since the last post, I can safely say I have been the sickest I have been in my entire life. It was horrible. I could barely leave my room. However, those few days provided some time to do some really serious thinking. Really serious. In a moment of unbelievable lucidity, which occurred after several days of a fever well over 101, it came to me.
I have figured out hip hop. It wasn’t hard really. It took a lot of sweating, and some unfortunate dreams about Nelly, but I boiled it down to one essential element: Rappers hate plurals. It was so simple it hit me like a freight train. I spent the next several days considering the repercussions of uncovering such a scandal. Perhaps I would be assasinated. Perhaps. Or maybe they would write a song about me. I know one of my favorite rappers, “Fat Joe” wrote a song entitled “Fuck 50″ where he talks about all the different ways he’s going to kill rapper 50 cent. Maybe Fat Joe likes plurals?
Whatever the case:
“I’mma keep shinin homie til my heart stop. ”
-50 Cent
Josh
The reader should note the following are among the non-hated plurals by rappers: Bitches, Hoes, G’s, and 20′s. Thank you.